Haruka's Diary
Chasing After Rainbows: Disorientated Feelings (Part 9)

09 April 2009

Disorientated Feelings (Part 9)

[revised: 10 April 2009]
(Continued from Part 8)

I'm hiding between the shelves and some equipment in the store room on the third floor. The room is lighted only by a small window positioned near the roof. There is a switch for the lights, but I don't want to switch it on yet. The store room seems to have a lot of things used for events, but there are things in here that seemed untouched for years that could belong to my seniors who graduated many years ago and now lay there forgotten. Reason why I'm hiding in a place like this is to make sure that Itsuki-kun would not bring his friends along before I approach him since the letter I dropped into his shoe locker yesterday does indeed look awkward.

I heard Kenjiro-san's voice along with Itsuki's voice saying about why someone called "Coltrane Gorbachev" would drop an official-looking letter in a foreign language, in Itsuki's locker specifically instead of his house. I giggled hard when I heard them say that name. "Coltrane Gorbachev" is the name I used to sign off in the letter in question: "Coltrane" is the western name that sounds closest to my given name, and "Gorbachev" (Горбачёв) is the surname of my late-great-grandfather that I could have adopted if he had brought his wife, my still-alive great-grandmother, to live overseas. Because my parents had me early (I'm only half their age), she does look too young to be my great-grandmother. Some of my classmates even have parents of her age!

Kenjiro: "This seems to be the place..."

Itsuki: "Are you sure? This looks like a normal store room. Why would that person want to meet me in here?"

Kenjiro: "Don't ask me, it this Koetrane Gobache who summoned you."

Itsuki: "It's Coltrane Gorbachev. You pronounced it wrongly."

Kenjiro: "Well, I, unlike you, have trouble pouncing foreign names written in the Latin alphabet, so don't blame me for that. Let's just enter this room to find out who it is, okay?"

They opened the door of the room I'm in and can hear the crowd from the outside. I would like to get out of my hiding spot, but only when his friend leaves and have the door closed, when I would switch on the lights.

Kenjiro: "Hmm, there isn't anyone in here. Well, I'm heading for lunch. See you later!"

Itsuki: "Hey, Kenjiro! Where are you... Hmm, I might as well see what's in here"

Hisakawa-kun entered the room and closed the door behind him and proceed to where the switch is, which is behind me. Like the style when I first met him, I covered my face with something and use that same voice I used as I approached him. After I switched on the lights of course.

Itsuki: "Who's t-there? S-Show y-yyourself!"

I appeared in front of him as soon as he said that.

Me: "Itsuki Hisakawa, eh?"

Itsuki: "You're Coltrane Gorbachev, right? The one who dropped this letter in my shoebox, and from your looks and voice, you're also the girl who has her brea... um, who crashed into me.

Me: "Yeah. That's right, that's was me too."

I could have sworn I heard him saying about my private parts. I would whack him if he said it on purpose, since if the shape of it is so obvious with all my clothes on. I don't know why I have such things or what's so great about those, but I don't like people to talk about it.

Itsuki: "So who are you? You made the letter to look like it came from the company I work for, and you are impersonating that famous Miyazawa Kotomi-san here? In fact, how do you even know where I work? I know that Coltrane Gorbachev can't be your real name since Coltrane is an American surname and not a given name. Gorbachev is Russian surname too. Also, why are you even hiding your face like from before?"

I can't take it any longer. My giggling turned into and uncontrollable laughter and I found myself rolling on the ground, laughing loudly. Oh no, my cover is blown in front of him: I unconsciously switched to my normal voice when I started laughing and my cover came off when I fell onto the floor. I tried to stop laughing and get serious as soon as it started, but my body forced me to continue on uncontrollably.

Itsuki: "Oh wait a minute, you are the famous Miyazawa-san all the guys have been crazy over. There has been rumors floating around lately since that incident that a girl tried to impersonate you, but I never thought that it would be you yourself in person to appear in front of me! Why?"

Me (still laughing): "I'm not sure why myself, but I started to become interested when I first saw you. Remember the two girls in the manager's office on your first day of work? One of them is me. That was when I started developing feelings for you that I can't explain myself."

Itsuki: "So my manager's daughter's friend I saw back then is you? Well, since the faces of every one there is new back then, I'm not really sure. But what's with all this secrecy just to meet me?"

Me (getting serious, almost angry): "If you know that I'm popular, surely you know the answer to that. There have been guys sneaking around since day one, taking photos of girls, especially me, without permission, and selling it to other guys like you. I pretended to not be aware of this, because it would just spoil my image, but they are invading my privacy and make me feel uneasy. On top of that, I have a reputation that I unknowingly started to keep here, and I'm not going to let this annoying feeling growing inside me, that everyone of our age seem to have, to go out of control. Because of this annoying feeling growing inside me, I have to relief it to a specific someone away from everyone else. And that unfortunate someone happens to be you. Even my friends and family never see me other than my happy and sad faces. Even so, it would come back again and need you again. If I find out that you tell anyone about our relationship, including that Kenjiro friend of yours, I would see what to do with you. UNDERSTAND?!"

Itsuki (scared): "Y-Yes, m-madam!"

Why is he replying to me like in the military where I am in a higher position giving out orders? Did I shouted at him angrily unknowingly? Hmm, my throat feels dry and my ears were ringing with the last word I said, so I think I did... oops.

Me (normal): "Oh, sorry, I seem to suffer from a mood swing sometimes. The anger came from the frustrations that had built up over time but have been unable to release. I thought you were the right person to release it at and not mind. Anyways, except for here, the school roof, at work, our houses, and when I say it's safe to do so. pretend we don't know each other as though we are random strangers. I will strategically plan and contact you when we would meet face to face as boyfriend and girlfriend. Ah, and here's my phone number and email address by the way."

Itsuki seems to be at a loss of words. I guess he's not used to seeing a side of me most have never seen before.

Me: "Erm, Coltrane is the closest western name I could think that has my given name, Kotomi, the closest pronunciation. And Gorbachev is my great-grandfather's birth surname... I might use that name again in the future.... Erm, Hisakawa Itsuki-san? Hello? What about we have lunch at the roof? I know the way there."

He's still in his shocked state, but did not resist when I pulled him to the roof via the hidden opening in the storeroom and the narrow staircase. The wide open area of the roof and the bright sunlight above brought his senses back.

Itsuki (running around): "What the... this is the legendary school rooftop that everyone is clueless on how to get to! Since the school has 4 levels, everyone has been searching around the fourth floor, but I didn't know the entrance to it is hidden in a storeroom on the 3rd floor. How did you find it?"

Me: "I was looking around at every corner of the school building, since I realized that there was a fan club full of guys dedicated to me was following everywhere I go to, including the quiet corner at back of the school. It wasn't easy trying to look for it. Recalling how odd it is about the windows around the storeroom and the water tower visible at the top of it, I took a look at the rooms there for any hidden opening. Sure enough, I found it at the storeroom on the third floor."

We sat around the shaded area of the "shack" that contains the stairs where we came from and had our lunch there together with our lunch boxes, but since we spent so much time downstairs, lunch had ended quite soon and had to quickly finish our food. We didn't have a proper conversation.

We departed from each other, where Itsuki departed at the third floor, and me finding out that the bottom of the stairs leads to a relatively deserted area where I would be able to get out safely without being found out that we are going together.

I still don't know why I am thinking of him a lot or want to go out with him though.

(To be continued in Part 10)

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中野区, 東京都, Japan
帰国子女 英語能力は堪能。趣味はアニメや漫画やプログラムコードを編集。通常、あたしの小説を英語で書いてです。Grew up abroad &travelled to different countries. I write my own fictional novel on my blog.