Haruka's Diary
Chasing After Rainbows: Looks like I'm non-existant to them

18 May 2008

Looks like I'm non-existant to them


1: Hey, isn't that where I think it is?

2: Look at all that cake...

3: Everyone except me...

4: Another one...

5: Not as much as the image before the previous one, but still...

6: They are having all the fun... (points to the people in the background)

7: Erm, I wouldn't even think of protesting...

8: This picture is just random, though I wished my school was like this...

I was randomly viewing my friend's profiles and to my horror, the pictures above (except 7 & 8) were found on some my friend's blogs with events that I could be at, but wasn't informed about it. Pictures 2-4 were taken barely a few days ago...

And to add "insult to injury", except for a few, most of my friends' blogs do not in any way link to me. Well, Friendster, Windows Live Messenger and Facebook are another thing, but...

Speaking of how sad my life was, I recall very little of what happened between when I was young and just a week ago, except for significant events. Here's what I remember:
  • being scolded for playing with the lift at a medical centre (<5)
  • playing at the playground at the park, kindergarten and primary school. (5-11)
  • got my finger stuck between glass doors (6)
  • got pushed and rolled down the stairs in front of everyone at primary school (not sure when)
  • having chicken pox (6)
  • having fever at least once a year (?-now; 12 was the last I got MC away from school)
  • the dentist in primary & secondary school (6-17)
  • a particularly old and deserted shopping center for some reason (12/13)
  • crying over not completing art o-level preparation works on the actual day and possibly affect other subjects that take place later (17)
  • bullied by guys and girls saved me from them (6-12)
  • first time I traveled by plane to KL (16)
  • Genting Highlands (14)
  • Shouting at the top of my lungs (18)
  • didn't get to the school I wanted (12, 17)
  • the time that I actually fainted and was rush to hospital (~6)
  • the last time I actually communicated to my cousins regularly (14)
  • the first subject that I failed (7/8)
  • the last time I played with a musical instrument, not counting computers and random keys on the piano (14)
  • stayed in school from morning until night, not counting camps (18)
  • school lessons that lasted a total of less than 6 hours per day (18)
Here are the list of things that I want:
  • in a (pre-)university course
  • visiting a non-neighboring country
  • worked before
  • have good friends, one that I would be happy with
  • not learning the difficult-to-remember subjects
  • a younger sibling/twin
  • born the opposite gender
  • able to see the stars at night
  • peace and quiet, including weekday afternoons
  • able to buy what I want
  • XBOX360/PS3/Wii
  • human rights in Myanmar and North Korea to be the same as that in European countries
  • less violence and more peace to people and nature
  • live long
  • ...and so on.
List of things I plan to do:
  • work and live away from my birth country (exact details are still being worked out)
  • in addition to the above, marry and have kids there
  • be happy, the situation now is full of despair
  • learn foreign languages
  • get a job, as long as it's more than my monthly allowance of $70, I'm happy enough
  • ...many more things, some are currently unforeseen

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中野区, 東京都, Japan
帰国子女 英語能力は堪能。趣味はアニメや漫画やプログラムコードを編集。通常、あたしの小説を英語で書いてです。Grew up abroad &travelled to different countries. I write my own fictional novel on my blog.